It’s late Saturday night and I’m sitting in my very neat, packed-up room, lying on my bed, wondering – will this be the last time I get to do this? And by “this” I mean – spend a summer with my family, friends and of course, my two favorite dogs. Is this my last summer at home? Is this what growing up is like? Is this the end of an era? It’s definitely a question worth asking and definitely a question that will be the root of many future discussions.

With only a day and a half left until I leave for New York, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. I’ve been pondering my career goals and life aspirations, my successes and failures, but most importantly my current state of being. Simply said, I’ve been thinking about my past, present and future.

 I was raised to be extremely independent and have grown used to operating on my own this past year; as a result, this summer has been anything but normal (for lack of a better word). The incessant pressures to act the same way as I did before college mounted higher than ever and the repetitive questions of “How was your season?” and “How do you like NYU?” just added sticks to the fire. Summer, for whatever reason, turned more into a job than a break from the constant rush of the city.

 Coming back home to San Diego has definitely been a learning experience this summer and the learning curve has been very steep. Throughout the Summer I’ve compared stories with teammates and friends, and I’ve found one thing to be certain – coming home isn’t easy, but that doesn’t make leaving any easier.

This summer has been filled with a ton of great experiences including: my family visiting from around the world, a trip to Indiana, friends hanging out, road trips up to Los Angeles, and of course lounging on the boat. But New York is calling my name and is bound to be nothing short of craziness, a fast-paced lifestyle and my much needed dose of some “me” time to figure it all out.

Yes, I love San Diego and everything it has to offer, but I felt like I have come to the crossroads of my childhood and my future adulthood and I must take the next step into my life. As much as my parents don’t like it they need to realize it’s all part of me growing up. My independent side is yearning for adventure and quite honestly, I’m stuck here.  I’ll be back in the Winter, for a few shorts days, perhaps even a few weeks, but the time has come for me to spread my wings and fly away from here.

Goodbye San Diego, you’ve been great. Next stop New York City.